New Year’s Resolutions

Last Updated on Monday, 2 January 2012 10:11 Written by Wally Amos Monday, 2 January 2012 10:11

Are you a person who makes New Year’s resolutions?  Sometimes I do and sometimes I don’t.  I made some serious resolutions back in 2000, when the new millennium was beginning.  I called them “affirmations” and I even used my name in each one, such as, “I, Wally Amos, will be more sensitive to the needs and feelings of others!”  I also added an exclamation point after each one, just to emphasize how determined I was about them.

I decided to be a better listener, more patient, a loving and caring husband and father, a supportive friend who was gentler with myself while eating nutritious foods and finding the fun in life.  I called them “Affirmations for a Stress-Free Century.”

I look back on that list and I feel pretty good about the job that I have done in keeping those affirmations.  I’m not perfect, of course, but I work at it every day.

So what can I resolve to do in the coming year that will make life better for both myself and for those around me?  Can I change the world?  Of course I can!  I cannot solve every problem worldwide.  But I can change my little part of the world.

I can do my part to eliminate illiteracy, by reading to children every chance I get.  I can bring joy wherever I go.  I can concentrate on converting negative habits into positive ones.  I can take personal responsibility for every decision I make in my life.  I can create love and laughter and smooches at every turn in the road.  I can stop and breathe.

Make it a Happy New Year.  The choice is up to you!

A Merrier Christmas

Last Updated on Friday, 23 December 2011 08:44 Written by Wally Amos Friday, 23 December 2011 02:19

I like Christmas. It’s a time of love, good food, family and friends; but it can be a time of tremendous stress, too.  Between spending, overindulging, ultra-excited children and extra responsibilities, it’s enough to exhaust a person.

2011 has been a tough year for me and for a lot of other people, too.  Anyone who knows me, understands that a positive and upbeat attitude is essential to my character.  One of the ways I maintain that positive attitude is learning to go with the flow.  I’ve had to give up trying to control everyone and every situation in my life.  It’s impossible to do and it drains my energy.  You know, giving up control doesn’t necessarily mean giving up responsibility.  It just means setting priorities.  If there’s too much to fit in, I have to work out what I can leave out.  That’s tough because I am a guy who likes to say “Yes!”  Some might call me the original “yes man.”

But in the end, we’re only human.  I once saw a quote that has become my mantra, “For peace of mind, give up being General Manager of the universe.”  Put things into perspective.  Is it really worth fighting over whose relatives we see first or what gift the family gives to Aunt Mary?  In the end, the best gift you can give is the gift of time.  So let the other person win.  Don’t take things too seriously.  Why get worked up over things that are not really important?

Take a deep breath.  Live and breathe in each moment.  Love unconditionally.  And don’t forget to laugh today and every day!

Mele Kalikimaka (that’s Hawaiian for Merry Christmas)

You are what you allow yourself to be.

Last Updated on Thursday, 20 October 2011 04:30 Written by Wally Amos Thursday, 20 October 2011 04:30

I used to blame others for the way I was.  I was twelve when my mother and father divorced.  I heard the fights and I knew they were not happy.  Still, it was a shock when my mother told me one day that she and my father were going to separate and I was being sent to New York City to live with my Aunt Della.  I wasn’t devastated.  I understood that it wasn’t my fault and I moved on with my life.

Years later, I told myself that I failed in my own marriages because I had not had the kind of loving example as a child that I needed to make the commitment that marriage required.   I told myself that I always wanted to keep the closeness with my sons that I lost with my own father when my parents divorced.  Yet, I failed to keep that promise to myself or to them.  I tried, but I was always busy on the road with the acts I was managing.  It wasn’t my fault, you see.

It took me a long time to come to grips with the fact that my failure to fully commit to my relationships was my own personal failure, not the result of a childhood trauma.  No one forced me to fall short.  I had allowed myself to be a disappointment because the grass was always greener on the other side of the street.  While I greatly regret the consequences of my shortfallings, I know that they made me the man that I am today.  I am still a work in progress.  But I take responsibility for my own decisions.  I wake up every morning, glad to be alive and aware that each day will be filled with as much happiness as I allow it to be.  It’s entirely up to me.